Dear customers -
Parenting really does seem like a huge inconvenience at times, and sacrifices do need to be made. I'm sure it isn't always easy to find someone to watch your kid when you want to go out and have a life, and sometimes, you need to drag them along. However, there are certain places that, under no circumstances, one should not bring their children. The porn shop is somewhere near the top of that list. No, the kid isn't going to remember this experience. He's busy drooling all over himself and crapping his pants. I have adult customers that do this. Your kid would fit right in. Still, a two-year-old has no place here. That's not a pacifier your kid pulled off the shelf and started sucking on. It's a butt plug(or, as we like to call it, an assifier). You might want to save the money you're spending on porn for your child's therapy later in life. If this is any indication, he's going to need it.
Signed,
Your friendly local rubber dick saleswoman.
yuck!
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